The room complete, now for me – March 8, 2010

Fred and I have finished the “man-cave” and I am really happy. The room is anything but caveish. I wish we had taken “before” pictures. Every time I look at the fireplace I smile. It was hideous before. I hated it so much I wouldn’t let anyone in the basement to see what was there. Besides the mess of the office, the fireplace was disgusting. Now, it’s beautiful. This picture above does not do it justice, but it will give you an idea of what it looks like.

We are very pleased with the results. Last night we played Wii bowling. I beat Fred mercilessly. I nearly broke 200, 10 pins shy. Now the match is on!

As for the lap band saga…..

I continue to be “non-compliant”…as they say. I am going to the doctor this week to start a new 6 month program that will hopefully, nip this addiction in the bud. I am amazed at how many blogs there are about people who gain all of their weight back and then some with the band and with the gastric.

My Aunt Joan sent an article to me about such things back before I had the surgery. I believed it when I read it. I want to prevent me from going in that direction. It’s like our bodies want to be big. We aren’t satisfied with the food we eat and need more and more. I know I’m like a hungry crazy person until I get a good amount of carbs and sugar and then I’m satisfied. But the weight goes up. It’s crazy.

After months, really now years, of counseling with an eating disorders specialist, doctors, surgery and the like, one would think I would have this figured out and be working on behalf of myself….but no! Even being happily married to Fred now doesn’t seem to stop my rambunctious compulsions.

Maybe I starved to death in another life. Maybe I’m just a spoiled brat. Maybe this disease is really a disease that I cannot overcome, much like diabetes, only somehow it’s worse. I don’t know. I wish I had the answer. Of course, if I did have the answer, I could be a millionaire.

I know I have all the power within me. It’s just using it consistently that’s the problem.

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