Tired after sleeping – February 22, 2010

It’s Monday morning. Fred spent all day yesterday working on the “man cave”. It has become a beautiful room. I’m very proud of him for working so hard to make it so.

I’m tired for him. It’s like I did the work, but I sat on the couch mostly watching him. I’m in a great deal of pain. I don’t know why. When I get up and move about, the pain gets worse. I know I have fibromyalgia, but this is wearing me out. I keep chalking it up to winter. Maybe when spring comes my energy will return.

I don’t think I’m the only one feeling this way. It seems like winter has been kind of rough on everyone. Perhaps its the lack of sun. Maybe its the cold. I’m just ready for it to be over whatever the reason.

I do have a bright spot. I am writing a letter everyday to Emily. I wrote for 30 days to Marks Grandma, now I’m writing for 46 to Emily. I use a scripture every day and write a thought about it. When I wrote to Mark’s grandma I found my own spirits lifted.

Isn’t it “cool” how when we reach out to someone else, we are somehow blessed more? January would have been a very long month if I hadn’t had the writing to perk me up. That’s why I wanted to write to Emily. It gives me a purpose.

Writing this blog has been a good thing too, although I haven’t been writing every day. It seems that if I wrote here every day I would be “boring.” I’m not sure what the difference is. Maybe it’s speaking from one heart to another heart. I am aware of who is reading so I am more focused. Maybe it’s because I get more of a response and I know my words are read and appreciated in a different way. Maybe I’ve simply discovered even more that I really like writing! It’s that simple.

I also know I like when people ask me questions. Again the focus is shifted and driven.

What do you want to know? You can ask anonymously. Or, you can let me know who you are and I will share my thoughts accordingly. Either way, we are on this planet together and learning everyday how we “fit”. I appreciate sharing this journey with you – very much.

As for the lap band situation. I go to the doctor tomorrow. I’m sure I’ve gained more weight. However, I will say that the “fill” inside the band must be getting back to the “sweet” spot because I can tell I’m eating less. I’m filling up more quickly and I feel restriction, which is good.

Fred is worried that I will get filled up too much again and get sick. I hope not! There is a fine line between restriction and being ubstructed. A closed and swollen stomach is VERY unpleasant. I just want to feel full and not hungry. I’m getting there.

Happy February. 🙂

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