I went to the support group today called, “a Healthy New You.” For the next 12 weeks I will meet with these folks to learn how to integrate the realize band and new eating habits into my life. I really like the doctor who led the group. I like the way she speaks and uses words. She seems genuine and caring. She’s a little blond 30 something who seems grounded. I believe I am open to her wisdom. On the other hand the group was a little sparse. There were suppose to be 10 and only 4 made it, due…

I went to talk to the lap band Psychiatrist today. I asked for some strategies to help me get through the bad choice making. She asked me if I wanted to get involved in a 12 week psychotherapy program with 12 other post-surgery participants. I said, yes, absolutely. I am eating more and more candy and crap. It is amazing how I was so obedient at the beginning. I remember at the first follow up group I was astounded at the people who wanted to “buck the system.” Now that the body is healed up, the fills don’t seem to…

Went to Dr. Sonnastein’s office today. I decided that I needed to relax and just allow myself to be the person I am. I can’t hide anymore. Yes, I ate carbs. Yes, I enjoyed the holidays. Yes, I’d probably do it again the same way. The results? I lost 4 pounds. I attribute it to the exercise. That makes me happy. I want to exercise more now. I feel better. My Aunt Joan in Massachusetts sent me a great letter about choices and getting back on the wagon. I think it hit home. I’m feeling more positive and would feel…

Every time I go to Dr. Sonnastein I feel like a little kid going to the Principal’s office in deep trouble. It’s my body, my choices, my steps to health not his. So why don’t I consume myself with guilt for me? I mean, why do I care so much about what he thinks as opposed to what I think. I hate this!! I did better with some choices today. I exercised a half an hour longer. I went after work instead of at lunchtime. I had more time that way. I may try doing that this week to see…

Here’s the deal. I am a carb addict. It’s even more apparent this week. My emotions are running gun shod over me. Work has been very stressful. Everyone employed by Gannett has to take a one week Furlough. That means I get a one week vacation without pay. This has scared me badly. I can’t afford to loose that amount of money. arg. I can’t remember if I’ve ever referred to myself as Too Much Mary Lu, but today, this is what I am. I am eating too much again. I spend too much. I think too much and fret…

Something wonderful has been happening recently because of Facebook and Blogger. I’ve connected and reconnected with people who touched my life – yesterday – and many, many years ago. These souls are blessings to me. They include my daughter and her husband, my nieces, Aunt Joan in Massachusetts, my “big” boss, Tom Callanin, the managing editor at the Enquirer, my youth group “kids”, long-time friends, other co-workers, and women and men I lived with at the House of the Carpenter. (The House of the Carpenter was a Christian community established in Clifton during the early 1970’s.) I’ve even connected with…

I don’t feel good today. Last night when I went to bed I thought I was coming down with a stomach bug. I got a headache and felt general malaise. That scared me. I can’t imagine what throwing up would be like with the lap band. When I throw up, it’s a whole body quake that doesn’t usually let up until I’m in the hospital hooked up to fluids and given some serious phenergan to stop the spasms. I prayed myself to sleep. That helped. When I awoke this morning, the head was still pounding but the stomach doesn’t hurt.…

It’s official, I’ve begun new adventure in movement. The place is called Fast Track. The workout studio used to be called Inches-a-Weigh. A bariatric surgeon from Cincinnati purchased the studio from Inches-a-Weigh so his patients could begin moving and exercising in a safe, healthier way. I was surprised and pleased to learn this. It’s one of those studios where the machines do the movement with you. The machines are much more sophisticated than they were back in the 70’s in the gym I belonged to then. I actually am a little sore from the workout, but its a good kind…

I realized I didn’t make an update on my puppy, Murry. I decided to have him put to sleep Monday, Dec. 29. He was in agony and had stopped eating and drinking. I held him until the vet gave the shot. I could tell Murry was relieved to be out of his misery. Poor thing. Allegra and Monty the cat searched for him for a little while. Then the two began to romp like they hadn’t in months. I think they were aware before that Murry couldn’t handle wild activity. They would sniff him, but never torment or jump on…

It’s Sunday morning. Monty and Allegra are romping around the basement as I sit at the computer trying to compile thoughts. My eyes are gritty with remnants of sleep and my nose is running. The laundry smells cleanly wonderful as the bleached whites whirl in the rinse cycle. In many ways I am feeling content and happy. I’m tired in a good way. The week-end has been full of volunteering and spending time with great friends. Fred asked me to help out at the First Lego League Regional Competition held at Twenhoefel Middle School. Twenty teams of students from fourth…