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September 21, 2008- Surgery is set –

My surgery date is set for October 8. Now the anxiety and excitement has kicked into high gear.

I find myself feeling depressed today. I started cleaning the garage early this morning and tried everything to get the stink out. Being a pet owner sure is hard.

I am also feeling a bit overwhelmed by the workweek. Power outages increased my workload tremendously. Then Dennis added an hour onto my life for obits. I missed two meeting starts because I was thinking they were later than they were.

It all worked out, but I feel schmucky.
Dorkish – and hungry – very hungry.

All my insecurities are welling up now.

I can’t do money right,
I suck at my job,
I love Fred too much and he really doesn’t want me.
My daughter is awesome, but I feel so dumb, needy and ask too much of her.
I want to cry and have a couple of times today.

Maybe it’s the soy milk coupled with chocolate chip cookies……….or fear.

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